Deepest Midnight

Chapter 12

Walking back around the kitchen counter, I approach Jack slowly, hoping he isn’t afraid of me. His hands are folded on top of the counter. His eyes stare straight ahead. I can’t read anything on his face. Tentatively, I reach out my hand, lightly touching his arm. I’m afraid he is going to flinch, but he doesn’t. He turns his head toward me, followed by his body. Jack reaches up and touches my cheek. His gesture makes me think he may actually accept all of this.

If only our life could be this simple--a boy and girl in love--the end. The only ending I ever wanted.

“I’m guessing you’re actually much older than I am. How old are you?”

Not what I expected, but I’ll take it. I won’t make a joke about how he shouldn’t ask a lady her age.

“Two hundred sixty-one, to be exact.”

After a few minutes of silence, I ask if he would like that drink now, which he readily accepts.

Taking my time, I pour him a scotch over ice. He needs a minute to take everything in, and I try to give it to him. I’m wondering if I should go for it, telling him the rest of the story, or wait, letting him process one thing at a time.

Setting the drink in front of him, I sit down on the next stool. I want so badly to wrap my arms around him and press my lips against his, but I hold off. If I hadn’t told him, we would have had to part very soon. At least this way, we can move on with some honesty.

Jack continues to remain silent and I can’t take it anymore. “Jack, can you tell me what you’re thinking?”

“I’m not sure where to start. You said you’ve never revealed yourself to a human before. It’s very weird to say that, by the way. Why me?”

“I have real feelings for you. Feelings, I haven’t had since becoming immortal. The only way to have an actual relationship was to tell you.”

“And, in all the years you’ve been a vampire, you’ve never felt this way for another person?”

“Never. You’re very special to me, Jack.”

He looks me in the eye as he hooks his arm around my waist, tugging me toward him. He crushes his lips against mine. In that moment, I know I did the right thing. He needed to know. There was no way to hide it any longer. What I feel for him is more than desire. Although, right now, desire is winning out.

Pulling back, he says, “I have more questions.”

“They can wait,” I say, as I pull off my top.

“Yes, they can,” he agrees.

We stand, kicking the stools out of the way. Kissing deeply, I unbutton Jack’s pants. We both seem to know what we want and get right to it. You would think this would be a bit awkward, but we have it down. Jack pulls away, peeling off my jeans and panties. His jeans come off next. He’s going commando and I wonder if he was dressing for convenience. He pushes me, not too gently, against the counter and lifts me up, hands under my buttocks for support.

Usually, he takes his time with me, but in this moment, we’re both urgent. Maybe it’s the violence he just witnessed or the overall danger of the situation, either way, I’m good with it. When he enters me, I cry out with pleasure and guide his back side with my hands. He takes me wildly, with an abandon that makes my head spin. It doesn’t take me too long to climax, loudly. It’s a very good thing the house is empty. Jack follows me, moments later. We are spent and breathing heavily. Jack sets me gently back on my feet and takes my face in his hands.

“You are incredible.” He gives me a sweet, tender kiss.

I tell him to ask me anything he wants. We decide the best place to talk will be in my bed, after a quick cleanup.

Once we are all cozy, Jack opens the discussion, “You keep saying human as if it’s something apart from yourself. So, you’d describe yourself as a vampire? These things are not getting any easier to say out loud, by the way.”

“You’ll get used to it. I’m not human, I’m immortal and that’s how we refer to ourselves, as immortals. We don’t care for the term vampire, mostly because of all the pop culture nonsense. The word vampire has become a joke in the modern world. The word no longer inspires the proper fear and respect, the way it used too.”

“Immortal.” Jack sounds like he is trying to convince himself. Jack rubs the back of his neck, as he stares at the ceiling. “This is truly unbelievable. However, it explains a lot. There were things about you I thought odd. Now, I know why.”

I try not to be offended. “Odd? Like what?”

Jack chuckles, “Well, putting aside the fact that I’ve never seen you in the daylight, I’ve also not seen you enter a restroom, other than the times we’ve showered together. In addition, I’ve never seen you eat. All things human beings do. You’ve never asked me to stay here. However, I thought that might have something to do with Alexandre.”

“I couldn’t ask you to spend the night. Then I’d be stuck in the house with you when the sun rose. Kind of a hard thing to explain how I fall into a deep slumber. And yes, I can’t ingest anything solid, my body certainly works differently from yours.”

Jack’s eyebrows go up, as if a thought has just occurred to him. “So…you drink blood?”

“Yes. But, I don’t kill those I drink from. Not usually, anyway.” I don’t elaborate. No need to go into too much detail too soon. But, he’s not having it.

“Usually?”

“We have the power to mesmerize humans and only take enough of their blood to nourish ourselves. Once released, they feel like they just had a dizzy spell, but have no memory of the actual event. It’s bad karma to hurt the innocent,” I explain, hoping that’s enough for now.

He nods, not pressing me any further on what usually means.

“How are you feeling about this? Do you still want to be with me, knowing there are hefty complications? We’ll never be able to have anything as simple as a lunch date. We’ll never have children.” I trace circles on his chest.

“This is strange, Millicent. There is no way around it. I’m doing my best. It will take some time getting used to.” He turns toward me, fixing me with those piercing, heavenly blue eyes. “Just know that I want you. Human or immortal. I don’t see that changing and I’m willing to figure this out alongside you.”

He kisses me, again with a passion that leaves me gasping for breath.

“Wait a minute,” Jack says. The last thing I want to do is talk right now. “You breathe.”

I can’t help but laugh. He is certainly observant. “Yes, we breathe more out of habit than an actual need for breath. It would be a dead giveaway if we didn’t.”

I want to point out my pun, as I would with Annie, but I have other things on my mind.

“I have a feeling that I’m going to be learning a lot from you. More than I already have.” He grins slyly and pulls me to him. Jack buries his face in my neck, covering it with kisses sending chills down my spine. We make love again, and I feel as if everything has fallen perfectly into place. I am a woman basking in the sun after centuries in the darkness.

Everything is so easy with Jack. My love for Julien was complicated and dangerous. I was not free in the 18th century to live as I pleased. Divorce was unheard of. Women who slept with men outside of marriage were considered whores, no matter how awful their husbands might be. Feminism was nowhere in sight.

There is the potential mess Alexandre could create. I do my best to ignore the unwanted thought lingering in the back of my mind. I can handle him when the time comes.

After a steamy, delicious shower, Jack reminds me that after I cut my arm, I told him there was more. This serves as a reminder that the night of revelation is far from over.

“Should I be scared?” he asks.

“I hope we are through the scariest part. But yes, there is more. Quite a lot, more. You should know my human story and how I came to be what I am. That part may concern you, as well. And you should brace yourself, it may be hard for you to hear.”

“Ok. I’m not sure what that means, but I would love to hear your story. Truth be told, I’m incredibly curious.” Jack gives me a half-smile.

I take Jack’s hand and lead him back into my bedroom. Once again, I feel nervous. Telling him about my past frightens me more than revealing myself as immortal. Part of me wonders if I should skip over how Jack looks exactly like Julien. I’m not sure how I would feel if Jack told me that he was attracted to me because I remind him of someone else. I need Jack to know everything, I believe he has proven that he can deal with it. We’re in this for better or worse.

“Everything ok? You seem hesitant.” Jack squeezes my hand.

“I’m good.” I squeeze his hand back, then release it.

Moving over to the fireplace, I pull on the black braided cord. Two panels of deep, blue velvet part to reveal my portrait. Although I could never part with the painting, gazing at it day after day is far too painful. I used to keep it under the bed but began to fear the portrait would somehow be ruined. Under a bed is not ideal storage for a painting over two hundred years old. My solution was to hang it on the wall in my bedroom, but keep it covered from my sight.

When I turn around I can see Jack is riveted, his head tilted to the side. He squints his eyes, then looks down like he’s trying to grasp a memory just out of reach.

“Have I seen this before? In a museum, or something? It looks familiar.” I’m not sure if I should be surprised or not. He goes on, “Wait, that’s you, isn’t it? Where could I have seen this before?”

“Well, we’ll get to that. Yes, this is me. My husband commissioned this portrait during the last few months of my mortal life. The only time I was ever truly happy.”

“The only time?” Jack asks.

“Until now, yes,” I answer.